But I wanted to talk more about my personal experiences, which come from a completely secular background. I have encountered many people in my life who seem to equate hate with fear or jealously. This is something I honesty cannot understand. I have NEVER felt fearful or jealous of things that I hate. Hate is not fear or jealously. Hate is hate. And, it seems to me that hate can be a very empowering emotion that makes me feel really fucking good. There's something about love and pacifism that seems so sad and depressing to me, whereas hate is rooted in raw, primitive power. I love feeling like a wild, savage animal. It makes me feel alive and it makes me feel righteous as hell, knowing that I am right and other people are wrong, and that it's my duty to CRUSH them with the power of my HATE.
But, I also know that too much of anything is not good. I prefer not to feel this way most of the time, but I think there are some situations in which hate is the best possible option. For example, when you have to stand up and fight the good fight, do you think you'll get there by acting soft and loving, or by getting fucking fired up and taking action? Think about it...people who constantly advocate for peace don't actually do anything at all. They just walk around and preach about peace and love. I'm sorry, but that type of stuff doesn't inspire me. What inspires me is the idea of going into battle! And it doesn't necessarily mean a physical battle with guns or bombs, I mean just going into the battle of LIFE. It's a struggle. It just feels to me that when things feel down and you need to make changes then you need to take some serious action, and that this is driven by a firey emotion which is nothing like love. I feel like it comes from the aggression that males, on a hormonal level, that you have to have inside you to understand (women can never understand this because they don't have any testosterone).
Is there anyone who can understand where I'm coming from or I am not making any sense?