[Blackleaf]

From The Sun -

Leaky Dmitri is flooded





By TIM SPANTON

IF you are feeling anxious about going back to work this week, spare a thought for hapless Dmitri Kramarenko.

Poor Dmitri is Azerbaijan’s goalkeeper, who let in EIGHT goals against Poland on Saturday.

And on Wednesday the 30-year-old comes up against in-form England and the goalscoring talents of Wayne Rooney, Michael Owen, Joe Cole and Frank Lampard.





It could get messy. Sven Goran Eriksson’s boys will be hoping to beat England’s all-time record score, 13-0 against Ireland back in 1882 at St James’ Park, Newcastle — where Wednesday’s World Cup qualifier will be played.

It took 12 minutes for the first of Poland’s eight to fly past 6ft Dmitri.

And you can bet your bottom Manat (the currency in the former Soviet republic north of Iran) he’ll have plenty of England balls to pick out of the net this week.

Dmitri, who plays for Russian club Baltika Kaliningrad, has been in the Azerbaijan squad since 1992 — but he may not even turn up on Wednesday. His excuses for missing previous away games include a “family illness” and having his passport stolen from his car.

[Just Some Guy]

You read the Sun??!!

Heh, well that explains everything then

[Blackleaf]

From The Mirror -


ENGLAND COULD HIT TEN

Mar 28 2005


..that's how many goals Azerbaijan boss Carlos Alberto thinks England will score on Wednesday




BRAZILIAN legend Carlos Alberto fears England could hit TEN in their World Cup qualifier against Azerbaijan on Wednesday night.

Alberto, who led Brazil to the 1970 World Cup and now bosses the Group Six minnows, saw his side destroyed 8-0 by Poland on Saturday.

And after England's impressive 4-0 victory over Northern Ireland, he believes the Three Lions could hit double figures for the first time in 99 years.

"If we play this badly and England play very well, they could score 10," he said. "After all, Poland should have got at least 10." England have hit double figures only twice before - a 15-0 battering of France in 1906 and a 13-0 thrashing of Ireland in 1882.

The national side's biggest recent win was 9-0 against Luxembourg in 1982.

But Alberto, who scored the magnificent fourth goal in Brazil's 4-1 World Cup Final win against Italy, still could not resist a swipe at Sven Goran Eriksson's side.

He said: "Poland, at this moment, are a much better team than England. We played England four months ago and they didn't show a good game.

"Their clubs are not the real face of English football because they have so many foreign players.

"In Poland I saw one of the true candidates for 2006." But Alberto does not hold out much hope at St James' Park on Wednesday.

He added: "England have many talented players. Of course they are the favourites.

"But my team are not afraid of anyone and in football nothing is impossible."

Eriksson is expected to name an unchanged team.

David Beckham and Steven Gerrard, who both took knocks against the Irish, reported fit and well yesterday.

Eriksson's men are 50-1 to win 10-0 and just 1-33 to see off Azerbaijan.

Bookies fear a big pay-out to punters who on Saturday took the 6-4 for England to score six or more over the week's two World Cup qualifiers.

[Just Some Guy]

wow, that's even lower than the Sun

Anyway, yes, Azerbaijan have a tinpot football team and it shows how crap we are when we have to revel in beating such an appaling side.

[Einherjar]

azerbaijan will win nonetheless.

[Einherjar]

did he worry?

[N^G]

it was only 2-0

[| I, CWAS |]

Damn what were the odds on a thread about Azerbaijan this year?

[Irish_Lefty]

Its fun to play in there country though for the whole pitch is circled a wall of soldiers .

[repr0bate]

2-0

Should have been far more.

[Smith 2.0]

We destroyed them in every department except where it counted - saying that, we still got the three points. Meh, we were never going to beat them 8-0 or whatever, when you build up something like that, it never happens, at least not with England. Owen should be dropped if he's not starting regularly for Real.

[Einherjar]

yehah. rooney and defoe would be great, though owen is more experienced.

[era o divertimento]

Did you see Carlos Alberto (Albzgcedcfhsdocfsapd's coach) just flip out on Owen after the game because a reporter made him think that Owen said he'd tally five? Classic stuff.

Hey, if England doesn't want Owen, maybe the U.S. can give him instant citizenship. He'll be an important player for them in 2006, just as he was in 2002.

England has some serious firepower, this doesn't seem to be a game to worry about, though it was fun to see the Azerdvedians go nuts when it went to half even.

[repr0bate]

Yeah...Owen was his usual modest good old English boy about it:

"If he checks my pre-match quotes he will realise that I never said anything about scoring five goals - I'd never be so disrespectful.

"But he'd be perfectly within his rights to criticise my performance - I've certainly had better games."

In a statement Owen added: "Fortunately I am a mentally strong person and believe I will learn from the experience and continue to improve as a player and person because of it."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/footbal ... 387967.stm

England will keep Owen, he's a celeb.

[Irish_Lefty]

Nah America can have hesky.

[Smith 2.0]

Andrew Johnson for England! I suspect Sven will start either Defoe and Rooney, or Smith and Rooney in September, but I'd go for a Jonno-Shrek partnership myself... legend.

[Einherjar]

who's shrek??

Remember vassell? He's surely gone a long way down.

[Smith 2.0]

Vassell has been hit by injuries the last season or so and hasn't started as much for Villa, hence this has affected his international status. He was class as a super-sub, but you would never start him, I don't think.