Weapon selection - Page 4 - Politics Forum.org | PoFo

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How do you respond?

Keep using the same sword anyway, on principle.
2
7%
Strap the sword to a long pole and call it a 'naginata'.
12
43%
Refuse to fight because you don't have a lance.
1
4%
Nail a letter of complaint to the townhall wall complaining about how unfair life is.
4
14%
Other.
9
32%
User avatar
By Hong Wu
#14681743
Frau has missed the point. Albert is almost there but he is only at the surface. Big things happen for reasons well beyond one human being’s control and it is actually more effective to focus upon making a perfect act, or a life well lived, than it is to focus upon "winning"; God (or heaven, or Buddha) will help other people follow you if a single person’s example is meant to grow.
User avatar
By Frollein
#14681749
Hong Wu wrote:it is actually more effective to focus upon making a perfect act, or a life well lived, than it is to focus upon "winning";
Philosophy is for losers.

mike, you had the right idea, but you may want to upgrade to a Panzerkreuzer.
User avatar
By Frollein
#14681755
mikema63 wrote:I'll ship it with a pair of good boots.
You're a true friend.

Albert, you stand no chance against the mighty Panzerkreuzer. Better reconsider and surrender now.
User avatar
By Albert
#14681760
No worries, we have plenty of scholars here, philosophers and engineers a plenty. Do not worry sweet damsel, nothing will separate you from me now.

One of great scholars here at the court, suggested we use giant mirrors to direct the sun and destroy the metal beast by powerful concentrated ray of sunlight. This surely is foolproof plan.

Meanwhile I hired some instructors to teach you beautiful dancing, like the dancing girls dance in those bars in the city. I really like it.
Last edited by Albert on 22 May 2016 21:22, edited 1 time in total.
User avatar
By Potemkin
#14681762
Potemkin gallops up and reins in his mighty warhorse outside the drawbridge of Albert's castle.

"Avaunt thee, thou rapscallion! Unhand that fair damsel at once, or I shall smite thee a mighty blow with mine gauntlet! What say you, knavish cur?!"
User avatar
By Potemkin
#14681765
"Gadzooks, thou varlet! Prepare to meet thy Maker, thou low-born wretch!"

Potemkin closes the visor of his helmet and prepares to charge at Albert's castle, his lance levelled at the gates. As his mighty steed's hooves thunder towards the drawbridge, it suddenly stumbles and throw Potemkin forward. His lance sticks in the ground, and Potemkin is propelled into the air and over the castle's battlements, landing with a 'Plop!' in a haywain full of manure, which collapses under his weight....
User avatar
By Rei Murasame
#14681767
Albert is giving so many reasons for why you need to quit that whole region, and quit heterosexuality also.

Image

Come eastward, golden fluffy-haired Frollein, we are even now preparing a sea invasion force of Japanese steampunk soldiers which will attack the whole Korean peninsula and then push up toward 'Russia', taking from them everything. Afterwards we'll establish roads that connect east to west and engage in productive trade. Everything will be guarded by female shinobi, who essentially were the 'Einsatzgrupen' of the pre-industrial world so it'll be a lot of fun!

Also, we dress better.

Also, bring gun technology when you come over. That'll come in handy.
Last edited by Rei Murasame on 22 May 2016 21:35, edited 1 time in total.
User avatar
By Hong Wu
#14681771
Potemkin wrote:"Gadzooks, thou varlet! Prepare to meet thy Maker, thou low-born wretch!"

Potemkin closes the visor of his helmet and prepares to charge at Albert's castle, his lance levelled at the gates. As his mighty steed's hooves thunder towards the drawbridge, it suddenly stumbles and throw Potemkin forward. His lance sticks in the ground, and Potemkin is propelled into the air and over the castle's battlements, landing with a 'Plop!' in a haywain full of manure, which collapses under his weight....

By the grace of God, you've infiltrated the castle! It's not for us to judge His methods...
User avatar
By Potemkin
#14681773
Potemkin stumbles groggily to his feet, lumps of manure dropping from his not-quite-so-shining armour.

"Aha! By the will of God, I have penetrated thy bastion of perfidy! Have at ye, unmannerly dog!"

Potemkin draws his sword and clanks his way towards Albert....
User avatar
By Rei Murasame
#14681775
mikema63 wrote:Frollein, I think you have an admirer.

Basically Albert gets toasted every time, since if we keep playing this scenario through as it goes forward, after Frollein's golden haired people gift my people with boiler technology and cannon technology, Potemkin's people will connect their stock markets to ours via telegraph, and then lend us money at attractive rates to go and shoot Albert's people.

It's pretty much destined to be that way.

1850 - 1910 is probably one of the most honest intervals in human history.
User avatar
By Hong Wu
#14681778
Rei Murasame wrote:Albert is giving so many reasons for why you need to quit that whole region, and quit heterosexuality also.

Image

Come eastward, golden fluffy-haired Frollein, we are even now preparing a sea invasion force of Japanese steampunk soldiers which will attack the whole Korean peninsula and then push up toward 'Russia', taking from them everything. Afterwards we'll establish roads that connect east to west and engage in productive trade. Everything will be guarded by female shinobi, who essentially were the 'Einsatzgrupen' of the pre-industrial world so it'll be a lot of fun!

Also, we dress better.

Also, bring gun technology when you come over. That'll come in handy.

The Japanese actually improved upon the Portuguese musket within a decade after first encountering it, but they didn't industrialize and become a military power until hundreds of years later. This was because they didn't want to industrialize because industrialization sucks. After they did it they got to attack a bunch of people, which was presumably fun for them in a way, but eventually the chickens came home to roost.

None of this stuff is ever happening again, battles are no longer fought militarily between developed countries due to MWD. Future "conflict" will grow perpetually more subtle and less violent. Beat your sword into a plowshare
User avatar
By Rei Murasame
#14681779
Hong Wu wrote:The Japanese actually improved upon the Portuguese musket within a decade after first encountering it, but they didn't industrialize and become a military power until hundreds of years later.

Yep, in more serious posts I explained this before as well. The original matchlocks couldn't fire in the rain, so the Japanese variant solved this (because country of awesomeness), and mass produced it. Except this mass production was not production line. Parts were not interchangeable because the tolerances were enormous. Production was still at the workshop phase.

The lack of production line industrialisation is because actually there was no way to do it. Miniaturisation had not happened yet (we take the vernier calipers for granted now, but back then none of that was in use), and did not happen until the British Army started mass producing rifles in which all of the parts were made 'like how you make small clocks'. When everyone else was going larger, the British Army wanted to look into the world of 'going smaller'. That innovation led to standardisation of parts and production lines, and it was only at that stage that transfers of this concept could happen, and it would only reach the east in the first part of the 1800s.

The history of industrialisation, is the history of how the British Empire came to manufacture mass produced guns with interchangeable parts with tight tolerances. Many people think it's Ford, and they like to think it's Ford that did it first because his was a non-violent application. But the truth is that the history of industrial humanity is the history of the gun. Repeat the same story with Germans and boilers, and Germans and ship cannons.

Development of productive forces goes hand in hand with destructive force. It is what it is.

Hong Wu wrote:and become a military power until hundreds of years later.

Japan was a military power prior to industrialisation though. It fended off Mongols twice, and on the third time the wind did it. Japan also aligned itself with Baekje and Silla to attack parts of the Korean peninsula back in those days too. Japan also had a trade outpost and garrison in Vietnam (by invitation), back when that was 'the Gulf of Aden of the East', and that outpost only was abandoned when the new trade routes made all of it irrelevant. Hoi An (aka Champa City) was to the Edo Bafuku, as Colony of Aden (aka South Yemen) was to the British Empire.
User avatar
By Albert
#14681783
Jesus Christ can I not keep Frolleinini to meself?
Knight in Shinning Armour wrote:"Gadzooks, thou varlet! Prepare to meet thy Maker, thou low-born wretch!"
Knight in Shinning Armour wrote:"Aha! By the will of God, I have penetrated thy bastion of perfidy! Have at ye, unmannerly dog!"
What language this man speaks *turns to his brothers in arms searching for an answer* And how the heck is he within the city walls already? Life is totally unfair.
Is he Duchman? He has to be, where is our duch translatour (Sabbaticus) when you need him? Is he ball and chain at the red light district again?
User avatar
By Frollein
#14681788
mikema63 wrote:Frollein, I think you have an admirer.
I have several *tosses hair*


Rei Murasame wrote:Albert is giving so many reasons for why you need to quit that whole region, and quit heterosexuality also.
Sorry, we can match up for tactical reasons and fun warfare, but I just like the boys better than the girls. Nature hath made me so.

Come eastward, golden fluffy-haired Frollein, we are even now preparing a sea invasion force of Japanese steampunk soldiers which will attack the whole Korean peninsula and then push up toward 'Russia', taking from them everything. Afterwards we'll establish roads that connect east to west and engage in productive trade. Everything will be guarded by female shinobi, who essentially were the 'Einsatzgrupen' of the pre-industrial world so it'll be a lot of fun!
Yes it does. Though I have to inform you that I have dark hair, as I hail from Bavaria originally.

Also, we dress better.
That is also true.

Also, bring gun technology when you come over. That'll come in handy.
How about a tank platoon. We won a prize recently.

Albert wrote:Jesus Christ can I not keep Frolleinini to meself?
The Muse doesn't belong to any one man, Albert...
User avatar
By Potemkin
#14681791
Half a dozen of Albert's henchmen rush forward, swords and cudgels drawn to attack Potemkin, who swings wildly at them with his broadsword and misses. Potemkin, off-balance, slips on a lump of manure on the ground and falls against the wooden post holding up the roof of a wooden storage hut in the castle courtyard. The heavy roof collapses on top of Albert's henchmen, knocking them out. Potemkin staggers to his feet again, and rushes forward towards Albert.

"Fear not, fair damsel of the Rhine! I shall saveth thee from this varlet's foul clutches!"

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