[1stworldview147]

Do mail order bride really exist?

The answer is Yes, and No, it really depends on your definition of mail order brides.

The historical roots of the mail-order bride industry that emerged in the 1800s in the American frontier:  European American men found financial success in the migration West, but the one thing that was missing was the company of a wife. Very few women lived there at this time, so it was hard for these men to settle down and start a family. They attempted to attract women living back East; the men wrote letters to churches and published personal advertisements in magazines and newspapers. In return, the women would write to the men and send them photographs of themselves. Courtship was conducted by letter, until a woman agreed to marry a man she had never met.[9] Many women wanted to escape their present way of living, gain financial security and see what life on the frontier could offer them. Most of these women were single, but some were widows, divorcees or runaways.

During most of the 20 century,  the mail order bride continued  with the main method of women putting themselves in catalogs. Then men would view the women's profile, then for a fee order the women address. These became the main order bride companies business method in the 20 the century, with the fall of the Soviet union and cheap airfares,  these companies  spread from Asian to Eastern  Europe, mainly  now the Ukraine

Today most women do not leave their countries to escape poverty but to seek a man they believe will be a good husband and  provider, that is family orientated and that looks at women with more respect than in many countries around the world.

With the advent of the intent, the mail order bride industry boomed  into a billion dollar industry, Now with a few pictures and website, anyone could be in the mail order bride business.   With hundreds of ma and pop shops opening over the last two decade, Most who were clients of one of the three original mail order bride companies,  A Foreign Affair (AFA), Anastasia and EC,  The owner  of ForeignLadies.com  met his wife while working on  a tour  from loveme.com,  A Foreign affair  still today in the largest in the industry, each week they offer tours to one of a dozen countries  China to Peru and everywhere in between.  The industry  grew so fast in 1998, Senator Cantwell of Washington state  introduces legislation to regulate the mail order bride industry.  and a new law Called:  "International Marriage Brokers Act"  or IMBRA was born. With stiff regulations, many companies like Anastasia moved from Bride business to Fantasy Chat.


Although the industry  strongly objects to the term mail order brides,  saying  there is no difference if   man  in New York courting a woman from California through match.com, then courting a woman from Russia. Critics  like the Terra Justice Center  has a different out look, saying these men take advantage of women oversea. But studies have contradicted these statement and show abuse is actually  lower in these marriages. See "International Marriages - A Report to Congress"

So why do thousands of women join these site: Elena  Kosalova of the Ukraine says, "Men here are not serious about family,  they expect women to stay home while they go out each night with their  friends and drink. I want  a man who s serious, mature and who wants to be with his wife and family.  I have met Americans in the past and they seem more reliable and mature."  Elena rejects the idea  she is a "Mail Order Bride"

Why do men seek  a mail order bride:  James Goodwin, 43 of South Carolina says, " I  meet women here all the time, but I just can not find the values I am looking for..  I have dated here for more than 20 years, After three days in Kiev, I was shock at how many beautiful women I met that I would consider marrying,  now I am just trying to reduce my options and pick the right one. It truly is the fastest way to find a beautiful sincere women.

So what is the cost,  the cost can range greatly from site to site and from type of service,  AFA or loveme.com offers everything from letter writing, tours and executive services for the rich and famous. As little as $12 to as much as $25,000.  The owner John Adams say's the best way is just go over and meet then women, avoid letters and never waste money on expensive chat.  You can meet up to 1000 beautiful women in just 10 days, it will be the greatest vacation of your life. Joe Nail of ForeignLadies.com, has stayed with the traditional  Letter Writing, Each letter is $7.50 and  but say they do plan on offer some limited chat option.

Many sites like,foreignwomen.com, PhilippineSinges.com, and  UkraineSsingles.com, that offer simple unlimited membership for $29 per month. These type of site also target pacific regions, like Asia, Latin America or Eastern Europe.

There is  also a site for  mail order grooms; SingleMenOnline.com, that caters to men publishing their photos in hopes to meet an American Bride.

James Dunn, who is a ghost writer for  review sites says "You  get what you pay for.  Membership sites to do not screen the members at all. so you never know who  you really are writing,  The big boys require the women to apply in person in one of their  local offices. The companies that offer group tours will introduce you to hundreds of beautiful  women, for the cost of $1000 to $3000 depending on location, about the same you would pay for any  vacation.  Several companies also do individual tours these can range from $750 to $1500, But only arrange one to one introductions,  Always make sure they are biased in the USA  or EU,  Most of the complaints  come from small agencies that are desperate and need to make as much as they can from you.  Just a note, if the company is based in an a foreign  country you will have no   recourse if they do not follow through.


So do mail order  brides exist, If you belive a if a  woman  is a mail order bride if she lives in another   county then Yes, But if you believe it  just another dating option like any on-line dating site, matchmaker or  dating service, than No. . It really seems like a doubled standard in the world,  If a women meets a man in Italy or France,  then oh that is so romantic, but if a man meets a women in Philippines, than ...

[Godstud]

Yes, it's a double standard. It also depends on the people and if money is a deciding factor.

Some might compare my marriage to a mail-order thing, but because I moved to Thailand and married my wife and life there, maybe not. I don't care. I'm happy.

[anasawad]

There are many types of mail ordered brides. Some are consensual and some are not.
From eastern Europe mostly girls from very poor backgrounds accepting it, though with a large degree, many of these things are just cons to get money and its untracable, it happens.
Now on the other hand you have the enforced ones, usually and most specially happening in war torn regions and countries, like Syria at the moment.
Where many girls, some are very young, are being sold by force into marriages with richer people mainly from the gulf states, Saudi Arabia specifically.
These has made a huge backlash against in Jordan and Lebanon when they started happening, in Jordan the royal government started applying life in prison against anyone who takes girls and sell them into marriages. In Lebanon a death penalty was and still is applying to such people.

The problem with this type of marriages is mostly with the fact that once its done, the girl in most cases can never get out of, which as obvious, not good.
Unfortunetly there is not much being done about these types of things in the international community, and on the other hand the countries where these things do exist, poverty is sky rocketing which means that its almost impossible to prevent such things without fixing poverty first.

Belarus has been trying to fix and regulate these acts by a number of policies, and there are also many programs to stop poverty and its been successfull to a good extent however the 2011 economic fall down has had its effects on the people, which kind of escalated the problem. Anther factor is the place these agencies, who if i was to call them, nothing less than pimps, do not operate inside of Belarus rather mostly in Russia and the US, which neither are even trying to do anything about it. That is why an international movement should push for regulations on these agencies to stop any form of abuse.

[Igor Antunov]

Yes and it's not quite what you think. It's not just about money. Typically the considerations are identical to matchmaking closer to home, the net is just widened. Primary concern provided the husband to be isn't a maniac is social security, wanting children and wanting them to grow up in a beneficial economic setting, etc. Many women who choose this also choose their partner 100%.

You still have to woo her and she can still tell you to fuck off whatever your economic standing. It comes down to not being able to find an acceptable husband closer to home due to a depressed socio-economic situation.

[Godstud]

Sometimes it's about the money. Sometimes the people make more of it than money and it works out just fine. Sometimes... not so much. It's entirely on what they both expect out of it. If they make it about money and keep it about the money, it'll never be more.

Many women who choose this also choose their partner 100%

QFT. All women want a good provider.

[anasawad]

Not all "agencies" who offer mail order brides are legit and consensual. Many agencies of such kind over the year has been linked to human trafficking.
Its way undr regulated and that allows abuse.

[Godstud]

There is abuse, but often, depending on which country you go to, the immigration policies might give more protection to the 'bride'.

[anasawad]

@Godstud
True, but the countries where the largest number of these girls tend to be sent do not have such laws.
And on the other hand, as i said, you have to consider that not a small, but a very large number of girls who are so called brides are sent to literal slavery in countries like Saudi Arabia, Qatar, Kuwait, etc. And those have the highest number of these girls going to.

Even at one point, i believe a couple of years ago, Salwa al Mutairi a Kuwaiti politician proposed the legalization of sex slavery of non muslim girls and specified Russian and east European girls in the proposal along with girls from war torn countries. With the proposal being discussed by many politicians, royalties, and clerics across Kuwait and Saudi Arabia and for many, taken seriously.
I will point that mail order bride agencies have a considerably thriving market in these countries and most of the girls are from eastern Europe.

When you run across these things, and the fact that these countries are known to have actual slavery in them, it is clear as sun that these "agencies" whom bring girls from Russia and eastern Europe mainly (countries that are known for human trafficking), and send them to the gulf states are simply legal fronts for human trafficking.
Which BTW, one of the reasons why there has been calls for regulation and even banning all type of agencies that offer these things from the Belarussian government and has spawned a sort of political tension between Russia and Belarus in the past years.