These were some of the most badass cossacks off all time. They held off Turkish invaders, defeated Poles and mostly important defended the motherland. Here's a letter they totally got from the sultan and their response:
Turkish Sultan Mehmed IV wrote:As the Sultan; son of Muhammad; brother of the Sun and Moon; grandson and viceroy of God; ruler of the kingdoms of Macedonia, Babylon, Jerusalem, Upper and Lower Egypt; emperor of emperors; sovereign of sovereigns; extraordinary knight, never defeated; steadfast guardian of the tomb of Jesus Christ; trustee chosen by God himself; the hope and comfort of Muslims; confounder and great defender of Christians—I command you, the Zaporozhian Cossacks, to submit to me voluntarily and without any resistance, and to desist from troubling me with your attacks.
Cossacks wrote:Zaporozhian Cossacks to the Turkish Sultan!
Thou art a turkish imp, the damned devil's brother and friend, and a secretary to Lucifer himself. What the devil kind of knight art thou that cannot slay a hedgehog with your naked arse? The devil shits, and your army eats. Thou a son of a bitch wilt not ever make subjects of Christian sons; we have no fear of your army, by land and by sea we will battle with thee, fuck thy mother.
Thou art the Babylonian scullion, Macedonian wheelwright, brewer of Jerusalem, goat-fucker of Alexandria, swineherd of Greater and Lesser Egypt, Armenian pig, Podolian villain, catamite of Tartary, hangman of Kamyanets, and fool of all the world and underworld, a fool before our God, a grandson of the Serpent, and the crick in our dick. Pig's snout, mare's arse, slaughterhouse cur, unchristened brow, screw thine own mother!
So the Zaporozhians declare, you lowlife. Thou wilt not even be herding Christian pigs. Now we shall conclude, for we don't know the date and don't have a calendar; the moon's in the sky, the year in the book, the day's the same over here as it is over there; for this kiss our arse!
Koshovyi Otaman Ivan Sirko, with the whole Zaporozhian Host
This letter is something like Barak Obama writing to Chavez to submit . And Chavez reply to it .
I do not think that any nation is hopeless to change; however, I think that some nations do require a lot more effort than others to become changed. - Verv
The Famous Cossack Letter immortalized in the painting "Zaporozhian Cossacks of Ukraine Writing a Letter in Reply to the Sultan of Turkey" by Ilya Repin is a historical puzzle. We know that an insulting letter was actually written in the 1660s in answer to a letter from Sultan Mohammed IV of the Turkish Empire. However the question is was it actually composed as a historical document or was it only created as a piece of literature? Historians have taken both sides of this question.
There are variations of the letter but the main thrust of the letter is a parody of the Sultan's titles in a manner which shows cunning knowledge of what would be most insulting to such a mighty ruler. The letter was probably originally composed in the 1660s, and Ivan Sirko (ca. 1605-August 11, 1680), a famous and fierce Ukrainian Cossack warrior, is given as the signer of the letter. Apparently, this is a letter in reply to the Sultan's demand to the Cossacks of Ukraine to voluntarily accept Turkish rule.
The Ukrainian Cossacks did not make empty boasts when they wrote of battles on land and sea. The courageous Zaporozhians fought on several occasions to the gates of mighty Constantinople itself. These events were reported throughout Europe and even distant England and Holland took an interest in them. For example, the Gazette of Antwerp on December 10, 1621 reported. "New messages from Germany how 50,000 Kozaks (Cossacks).... have crossed the Danube to plunder and burn up to Constantinople." (British Museum No. pp. 3444.af (326).
Ripley's New Believe it or Not pocket book no. 992 has distinguished the Ukrainian letter by calling it "The Most Defiant Letter." However, it confuses Ukrainian and Russian history. There are 17th century copies of the letter which were circulated widely probably as humorous literature. It may be found in many sources, for example in the Annals of Kiev (Kyivska Starina Vol. II, p. 371, 382, 1891, the histories of Prof. D. Yavorytsky (Evarnitsky) and in his pamphlet published in St. Petersburg in 1902.
English language versions may be found in The Cossacks, by W.P. Cresson and in the Portable Russian Reader, edited by G.B. Guerney (New York 1947) which is based on the Russian historian M. Pokrovsky. I also published it in MYH Beams (Ukrainian National Youth Federation in Toronto, vol. IV No.1, January 1958, p. 8).
The Cossack Letter is famous today mainly because of the great painting by Repin which captured some of the rough spirit of independence and brotherhood of the Zaporozhian Cossacks of Ukraine. Repin did extensive research for his painting with the aid of historian Dmytro Yavorytsky so the painting reflects a careful reconstruction of a possible scene in the seventeenth century. The painting and the letter both reflect part of the heritage of the Ukrainian nation.
I think it was Zaporozhian Cossacks' ring leaders that were executed with canons by the order of Cathrine the Great, and the organization destroyed. Russians always remember this moment with pride and Ukrainians with frustration. Yes, it is the wonderful world.
- By wat0n