[Agent Steel]

As for the scenario presented, I thought it was pretty interesting. I don't think they should have been charged with "rape" however if I were the judge I would charge them something. Corruption of a minor, or second degree assault, something. But it's not a first degree rape by any stretch.

Is the prosecution suggesting that mentally retarded people cannot consent to sex? I mean, presumably their cognitive abilities and maturity level would never advance beyond that of people who are of legal age. At some point even a handicap person would have to become responsible and be legally allowed make these types of decisions.

It's not clear to me what law these boys actually broke.

[MistyTiger]

@MistyTiger

I likewise have to feel comfortable and safe around the person I'm with, but I think maybe as a man I have less reason to fear for my safety. Maybe it's different for women than it is for men, because women have to worry about being physically overpowered and hurt. I don't have this fear because I am generally physically stronger than the average woman.

That said, there still are women who are ok with having sex with strangers. I think it's more common among men, but women are into it too.

I am sorry to hear that you have had several unpleasant and unenjoyable experiences with strange men. But do you think this is the norm for women? Do you think you would have a different view if your past experiences were better?

As a man, you never worry about catching an incurable disease like AIDS?

I think I'd be less scared around strange men if I hadn't had unpleasant experiences around men. But, I still need that emotional connection. I'm a writer chick. I like to have those romantic feelings and I like feeling loved and beautiful for a guy I'm with. It can't just be some hot guy and we're both tipsy and bored. I used to be a flirt but then I realized it got so predictable and formulaic, then it's like repeating a drill. So I stopped flirting.

[Rich]

The problem with sex and sexual interactions is that we have no good scientific data. Good scientific data would require us to secretly film large number of couples from multiple camera angles from the beginning of their interactions to the end of their interactions. Obviously this is not possible, but even in this imaginary scenario your scientific problems would be just beginning. Because even with visual ,infra red and sound recordings of these interactions, there would still be huge room for interpretation. Even if with all this surveillance I suspect there would many case where there would be disagreement on whether a rape or a sexual assault had taken place. And this is just for people without learning difficulties.

People will say such and such a percentage of rape allegations are false. In truth no one has any real idea. In lieu of any actual hard scientific data people just fill in the blanks with what ever suits their ideological predilections. I only watched a few seconds of the video. I'm quite familiar with this sort of trash.Its pure propaganda, where the total power of the creators over the narrative allows them to manipulate the viewers. They normally follow the formula of appearing to support the opposite view point and then pull the rug from under the viewer by revealing how it really happened, revealing the "real events".

But its not a real event. In the real world we don't have access to the real event. These situations don't even have to involve intentional lying, most humans make poor witnesses at the best of time. The heightened emotions around sexual interactions whether they be desire, fear, excitement only make this worse, especially as many first time sexual interactions occur under the influence of recreational drugs and or alcohol. Its not just that police, prosecutors, jurors, judges etc don't have access to the real event, neither do the participants. They only have access to their memory of the event, or the memory of the memory of the event.

Normally in a case we want to have a forensic deconstruction of the witness. A ruthless cross examination to look for flaws and contradictions. At least that way you make best use of the limited evidence that is available. but in the case of an alleged sex crime, this can be traumatising and humiliating for the alleged victim and may even be traumatising and humiliating for the alleged perpetrator. What we are often left with is an inability to prove beyond reasonable doubt that a crime has taken place, but also an inability to prove beyond reasonable doubt that a crime has not taken place.

[Agent Steel]

As a man, you never worry about catching an incurable disease like AIDS?

Not even remotely. I never have unsafe sex. I always take precautions.

[MistyTiger]

Not even remotely. I never have unsafe sex. I always take precautions.

Do you ask your partners to get tested first? So you think condoms can protect you. But condoms can break.

[Godstud]

@MistyTiger Life is a risk. You take a risk every time you step outside the door of your house or apartment. It all depends if you feel the risk is worth the rewards. You can only diminish risk, but you can never remove it entirely.

[Agent Steel]

Do you ask your partners to get tested first? So you think condoms can protect you. But condoms can break.

It can't be passed from mouth to mouth. For example I was at a college party once and found a hot girl there and we made out. I can't catch AIDS from doing that.

It's normal for young people to hook up like that. Young people have a high sex drive and like to have fun even if they only just met the person that night.

[MistyTiger]

@MistyTiger Life is a risk. You take a risk every time you step outside the door of your house or apartment. It all depends if you feel the risk is worth the rewards. You can only diminish risk, but you can never remove it entirely.

I understand. I have had many close calls while driving. If I had driven slower or hadn't been paying attention, I could have gotten into a serious car accident.

But I don't think it's usual to engage in the hookup culture. Not everyone feels the need to fool around with a stranger. Some people wank off in private or they prefer private services. I studied crime and some crimes could have been prevented if the victim had avoided the stranger. There are lots of weirdos and psychotic freaks out there. I don't want to be with a psycho just for an hour of sexual gratification. It's unwise. It's not worth it.

@Agent Steel There is mono.

Anyways, I don't mess around with guys just because they're hot. Some guys can get possessive and I don't want to encourage that. My sales rep Chris got a wee bit possessive of me and we never made out or did anything, he just has a crush on me and we communicate weekly. I'm his support person.

[Agent Steel]

@MistyTiger Men and women are different. Why is it celebrated when a man is promiscuous, but it is frowned upon for a woman?

The reason is because if a key is able to open many locks, it is a good key. If a lock can be opened by many keys, it is not a good lock.

[MistyTiger]

@MistyTiger Men and women are different. Why is it celebrated when a man is promiscuous, but it is frowned upon for a woman?

The reason is because if a key is able to open many locks, it is a good key. If a lock can be opened by many keys, it is not a good lock.

It shouldn't be that a man is celebrated as a stud and a woman is condemned as a dirty slut. In ancient times, many men who had multiple partners contracted syphilis and died. STDs can lead to death in men and women. So actually, it's dirty for either sex to be promiscuous. Having widely different standards is part of sexism and it's very upsetting for women.

Sexism is present in all aspects of life. It explains why a man is more likely to be promoted over a woman with similar education and work experience. Men are just considered to be better and smarter, which isn't always the case. It explains why most high ranking government officials are men. It explains why men in general earn more than women.

But back to the subject of promiscuity. If I know that a man hooks up all the time, I lose respect for him. I refuse to get involved with a man like that. I just assume that he sees women as the means to ejaculate and it doesn't matter if they enjoy it or not. He probably doesn't care if the woman faked the orgasm or not. And actually, women faking orgasms happens a lot more often than men think.

[Puffer Fish]

So your 'counterargument' about her not being able to consent was just a question of whether she could ever have sex. The answer would be no. Just like a 3 year old never has sex. Still confused?

That's not really a fair point. It's a disingenuous argument.

A 3-year-old will have sex. Just not now. Maybe in 13 or 15 years from now.

This mentally handicapped girl, on the other hand, according to you, will never be capable of having consensual sex. Never in her whole entire life.

[Agent Steel]

It shouldn't be that a man is celebrated as a stud and a woman is condemned as a dirty slut. In ancient times, many men who had multiple partners contracted syphilis and died. STDs can lead to death in men and women. So actually, it's dirty for either sex to be promiscuous. Having widely different standards is part of sexism and it's very upsetting for women.

Sexism is present in all aspects of life. It explains why a man is more likely to be promoted over a woman with similar education and work experience. Men are just considered to be better and smarter, which isn't always the case. It explains why most high ranking government officials are men. It explains why men in general earn more than women.

But back to the subject of promiscuity. If I know that a man hooks up all the time, I lose respect for him. I refuse to get involved with a man like that. I just assume that he sees women as the means to ejaculate and it doesn't matter if they enjoy it or not. He probably doesn't care if the woman faked the orgasm or not. And actually, women faking orgasms happens a lot more often than men think.

I agree that men and women should not have different standards, I was only making a joke. I have never condemned women for behaving promiscuously, as who am I to judge? Actually, much of the judgment that gets passed onto them for being "sluts" is from other women.

But I still go back to my earlier point that part of it has to do with privileges males have in terms of physical size and strength. As the larger and stronger party I don't fear I will get physically hurt by a sexual encounter, so I'm more ok with hooking up with a woman I only just met.

[Godstud]

But I don't think it's usual to engage in the hookup culture.

It's usual, now, but it's extremely unwise. Don't engage in it. That said, I was only talking about it as a way to approach risk in our lives.

I agree that men and women should not have different standards,

Men and women have different standards because we are different. Such has and always will be the case. Equality is a myth as two different things cannot be equal.

But I still go back to my earlier point that part of it has to do with privileges males have in terms of physical size and strength.

Not privilege. Biological reality. The same way women are blessed with being able to give life, we are blessed with strength and thus are given the role of protector/enforcer in society. We cannot abuse that, however.

Women have "pretty privilege". Such is life.

[Agent Steel]

Men and women have different standards because we are different. Such has and always will be the case. Equality is a myth as two different things cannot be equal.

Wait, so do you think that it's more wrong when a woman is promiscuous than when a man is? That's the standard I'm talking about here, as it seems that our society views it that way. Do you go along with that or do you think it's equally wrong for both men and women?

[MistyTiger]

@Godstud

Men have pretty privilege as well. Tall men are more likely to be in management positions than short men. Handsome men have advantages over unhandsome men. This includes getting the job. It seems like a lot of news anchors and reporters are attractive men. People are more likely to buy an autobiography if the person in the photo looks attractive, man or woman.

Quite a few women prefer a tall man over a man shorter than her. They think tall is attractive.

I have been attracted to short men before. To me, it was about their eyes and their presence. Some short men are quirky and I liked that. I do prefer men with muscle but I wouldn't hold it against a guy for having a dad bod. I'm not exactly all lean muscle, so I understand. I'm not a total gym rat.

[Godstud]

Men are hired in management positions more due to competence, and not "attractiveness". Men do not tend to judge each other based on height. Few men in business are hired on attractiveness, unless you are talking about TV media and Hollywood.

Yes, news anchors tend to be attractive men. TV likes attractive people.

Quite a few women prefer a tall man over a man shorter than her. They think tall is attractive.

Biology. They feel like a taller man can protect them better. This isn't necessarily the case, but it's how things are. A 5'6" Martial artist is going to be much more protection than a 6'4" computer engineer.

I have been attracted to short men before. To me, it was about their eyes and their presence. Some short men are quirky and I liked that. I do prefer men with muscle but I wouldn't hold it against a guy for having a dad bod. I'm not exactly all lean muscle, so I understand. I'm not a total gym rat.

It's good to have realistic expectations. Then again, what do you consider "short"? To many women, being under 6'0", is short, and only 15% of men are actually that tall.

[Rich]

It explains why men in general earn more than women.

No it doesn't. Women earn less because they have babies and they are less obsessive in careers which require total imbalance between work and the rest of life.

[Agent Steel]

I'm with @Godstud on the "pretty privilege" thing.

It's true that attractiveness in general grants a person privileges in life, but how many men do you see making a living simply on the basis of them being handsome? None. Hot women on the other hand can start onlyfans accounts and get thousands monthly subscribers simply by posting pictures of their tits and ass. Women also seem to go a lot further in the performing arts simply because they are beautiful.

[MistyTiger]

:eh: Men are hired in management positions more due to competence, and not "attractiveness". Men do not tend to judge each other based on height. Few men in business are hired on attractiveness, unless you are talking about TV media and Hollywood.

Yes, news anchors tend to be attractive men. TV likes attractive people.

Biology. They feel like a taller man can protect them better. This isn't necessarily the case, but it's how things are. A 5'6" Martial artist is going to be much more protection than a 6'4" computer engineer.

It's good to have realistic expectations. Then again, what do you consider "short"? To many women, being under 6'0", is short, and only 15% of men are actually that tall.

Height does play a part. I have linked an essay that includes annotated sources. It discusses heights and leaders.

https://ilaglobalnetwork.org/does-size- ... eadership/

For me, a short man is under 5 feet 8. I see a lot of short men in my region maybe it's because English and Irish tend to be short. I can count the number of over 6 feet tall men that I've met on one hand. It's kind of funny.

And yeah, I am not looking for an Adonis or Greek god for a life partner. Not only is that ridiculous, I'd feel like an ugly ugly hag. I got my pride. Can you imagine taking photos beside a very handsome man? Everyone else looks awful. LOL.

[ingliz]

@MistyTiger

I am 5' 6" and my wife is 4' 10".

We were both taller when we got married but age has taken its toll.