Men see the lost cause of dating (girls don't like men) will it actully cause society to fall apart? - Page 15 - Politics Forum.org | PoFo

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#15200877
Godstud wrote:Are you trying to imply that it's worse to be accused of sexual assault than to BE sexually assaulted?

I was sexually abused one time when I was about 10 by a boy who was perhaps four and half years older than me. I've always been a hundred percent heterosexual. It was a somewhat unpleasant experience, i wasn't raped. It probably had somewhat negative but minor affects on development, but I can only imagine being accused of sexual assault would be a horrendous experience, whether the accusation was completely true, part true or completely untrue. So speaking as someone who has been a victim of sexual assault, I would say yes in some instances being accused of being sexually assaulted can be worse than some instances of sexual assault.

On the other hand if you live / hang out in a misogynist sub culture, then a sexual assault accusation may not be too bad, it could even be seen as a badge of honour. I doubt its a problem if you're a Hells' Angel. There's a guy I know spent some time in a Moroccan prison. There was a guy in prison for having sex with his daughter, the British guy I know was chatting to another Moroccan in the prison. He was angry about it. Angry that the guy who had sex with his daughter had been grassed up by his neighbour, which he thought was a totally unnecessary vindictive act.

There are some people, men and women who do believe that a man is entitled to have sex sex with a woman if she chooses to into private space with him or she gets blind drunk. We've seen them on this forum. But I'm not one of them. I can honestly say that I have never in my life once reproached a woman for sexual promiscuity, even though I've twice had girl friends / partners have sex with my best friend.

Even in bed, us both naked, our bodies entangled, I wouldn't presume an entitlement to sex and if I weren't in an ongoing full sexual relationship, its unlikely that I would initiate sexual intercourse. And that's not just some abstract theoretical scenario that I've never experienced. I don't drink alcohol, take drugs or encourage women to imbibe them.

Its just an unfortunate fact that in many instances sexual assault its very hard to prove or disprove beyond reasonable doubt. If people really cared about reducing sexual assault then they would give up alcohol. If we no longer took alcohol or recreational drugs, sexual assault would not be eliminated but it would be massively reduced. But we don't, because we have many priorities in life. Alcohol causes massive, massive societal damage aside from sexual assault. But I can't expect it to be banned just because I'm not into it. Society is a compromise between our different wants, fancies and predilections. I don't demand that alcohol be banned, but I do demand that in return society respect my right to not take the China virus vaccines even if they consider that course harmful to me and society.
#15200882
Rich wrote:There are some people, men, and women who do believe that a man is entitled to have sex with a woman if she chooses to [go] into private space with him or she gets blind drunk. We've seen them on this forum.

When you say, "We've seen them on this forum."

Who is 'them'?


:eh:
#15200962
Crantag I read your story and I know as little as you. I don't know why you'd default to siding with the guy, given that you admit you had no view of it. It could be as simple as him, even politely, asking to go on a date after she repeatedly said no. That's still inappropriate, even if it doesn't appear so to someone viewing it from the outside. It could even appear as if the woman were overreacting to a nice offer to go out for drinks after their shift from an outsider's perspective if you didn't see the last 20 times he made the same rejected offer in the past month.

Do false claims or accusations get made? Of course, same as anything else. But given that management let the guy go I'm going to assume something was there and it was known in some way. Or maybe the manager wanted to bang the waitress, who knows.
#15201012
SpecialOlympian wrote:Crantag I read your story and I know as little as you. I don't know why you'd default to siding with the guy, given that you admit you had no view of it. It could be as simple as him, even politely, asking to go on a date after she repeatedly said no. That's still inappropriate, even if it doesn't appear so to someone viewing it from the outside. It could even appear as if the woman were overreacting to a nice offer to go out for drinks after their shift from an outsider's perspective if you didn't see the last 20 times he made the same rejected offer in the past month.

Do false claims or accusations get made? Of course, same as anything else. But given that management let the guy go I'm going to assume something was there and it was known in some way. Or maybe the manager wanted to bang the waitress, who knows.

I don't think I intimated as though I knew all the details, but I perceived a pattern as I had heard the waitress agresively threaten another guy the same way, and she seemed like she had a chip on her shoulder.

I discussed this a little with some lower management (a dude and a female) who weren't at liberty to talk about it but expressed their dissatisfaction. I knew some details because I was there. I don't know the full details of the complaint.

There are gaps in my knowledge and anything is possible, but I think she was full of shit.

Don't act like upper management ever gives a fuck. Workers are expendable, especially in that sort of work. They aim for what is expedient.
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